During the first few weeks of M's life, I could not understand why people would say to never disturb a sleeping baby. I disturbed M all the time and she just went right back to sleep. That's the thing about newborns - they sleep all. the. time. Often, M would fall asleep while eating and, no matter how hard I tried, I could not wake her up to finish her bottle. I tried stroking her cheek, calling her name, kissing her, tickling her, changing her diaper, and any other way I could think of 'disturbing' her. She just would not wake up! The only thing that occasionally worked was the diaper change, probably because it was cold.
Then, at about 6-8 weeks, M began screaming uncontrollably in the late afternoon into the evening.
"It's the witching hour," veteran moms would nod, giving me that knowing, sympathetic look. So I chalked up the frantic crying to this so-called 'witching hour' and thought we would have to deal with the screaming every night until the magical age of three months, when babies apparently suddenly become better adjusted to things like sleeping and eating.
Several times, I called the doctor in a panic because M would not stop crying and I thought she would just cry herself blue. The doctor called it "colicky behavior" and suggested wearing her in a front-carrier in the afternoons (I think I did this one time), holding her upright after feedings (we always did this), and burping her several times throughout her meals (we did this since she was born).
Then I read something life-changing online. I can't remember exactly where it was, but somebody wrote about the importance of following your baby's cues. After all, especially when they are so young, babies act on instinct. They don't get hungry or tired because they are bored; they get hungry because they need food and they get tired because they need sleep! It is very important to notice when your baby tells you she is hungry or tired and to respond to her needs. If you learn your baby's cues, you will be able to give her what she needs BEFORE she starts crying.
Unbelievable.
Young newborns often show they are hungry by sucking on their fingers. M used to try to eat my shirt. (She still does this, but now it is because she constantly tries to eat everything.) Babies show they are tired by yawning, rubbing their eyes, fussing, or just lying amongst their toys staring but not playing with them.
Once I learned to notice M's cues and respond to them almost immediately, her nighttime screaming stopped. I realized she had been crying so hard because I had let her get overtired. I was so used to her falling asleep instantly in the first few weeks of her life that I wasn't yet trained (yes, trained!) to put her to bed for a nap when she needed it. As babies mature, they become more like us--they need the proper environment to sleep. M sleeps best in her crib while wearing her sleep sack and sucking a pacifier. We keep the fan on a low setting to circulate some air and provide some white noise to help her drift off.
Now that M gets her naps when she needs them, she has been sleeping much better at night and is usually in a happy mood while awake. That's not to say there aren't days when she still gets overtired (especially if we are out all day--she does not nap well in her stroller) or cries at night for other reasons, but overall, if I listen to the cues she gives me, she is a much happier baby--which makes me a much happier mommy!
Our babies can't talk, but they can definitely communicate--so pay attention to them!
And respect the nap, people. Respect the nap.
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